When Asking for Help is Hard.
Asking for support as a mum isn’t always easy. In fact, it often comes with layers of emotion and old stories we carry.
Maybe you’ve thought, “I should be able to cope on my own.”
Maybe trusting someone else to care for your baby feels impossible.
Maybe you don’t want to inconvenience anyone.
For me, it was the quiet, persistent belief that needing help somehow made me a bad mother.
But the truth is—motherhood was never meant to be a solo journey.
We need support. All of us.
And support doesn’t always have to mean saying the words “I need help.” Sometimes it starts with simply seeking connection.
Start with connection
You don’t always need to ask directly. Sometimes support looks like:
Sitting beside a trusted friend and talking honestly about how you're doing
Joining a local mother’s group or playgroup, even if you feel nervous walking in alone
Attending an event or workshop where other mums will be—people who get it
Commenting in an online mums’ group and realising you're not the only one feeling this way
It can feel vulnerable at first. But showing up—even just once—can be the beginning of something bigger. A conversation that makes you feel seen. A shared laugh that lightens the load. A connection that grows into friendship.
In a world that often leaves mothers isolated, seeking support isn’t weakness—it’s wisdom. It’s a quiet, powerful way of saying: I matter too.
You were never meant to do this alone. Your village is out there. Sometimes it begins with a single step.
Asking for support as a mum isn’t always easy. In fact, it often comes with a tangle of emotions.
Maybe you feel like you should be able to cope on your own.
Maybe trusting someone else with your baby feels too hard.
Maybe you don’t want to bother anyone, or you fear being judged.
For me, the story I carried was that asking for help meant I wasn’t a good mother. That I was somehow failing.
But the truth is—motherhood was never meant to be done alone.
It’s not a solo journey. We all need support.
And the beautiful thing is, asking for support doesn’t always have to look like saying, “I need help.” Sometimes, it begins with small acts of connection.
Seek connection
Support often begins with community—being seen, heard, and understood by others in the thick of it too.
You might:
Sit with a friend and talk things through
Join a local mother’s group, playgroup, or parenting circle
Attend a workshop or community event for new mums
Join an online group and slowly start engaging—asking a question, responding to a post, or simply reading along
It can feel daunting to show up to these spaces, especially alone. But so many other mums are craving connection too. You’re not the only one.
Use your kids as an icebreaker
Making new connections can feel vulnerable. The fear of rejection is real. So start with what you already share—your little ones.
Try a gentle icebreaker like:
"My little one has that toy too!"
"How old is your bub?"
"Did you find that stage as tough as I am right now?"
These small moments of connection can spark real conversation—and, over time, friendship.
Find someone to listen
Sometimes, we just need to get the thoughts out of our heads.
If talking to family or friends feels too close, reach out to someone outside your circle—a support line, a maternal health nurse, a counsellor or psychologist who works with mothers.
You don’t have to wait until things feel like they’re falling apart. Sometimes, being heard is enough to help you breathe again.
Support others (and find support in return)
Offering support to another mum can be a gentle way to build your own village.
You might:
Smile at a tired-looking mum in the playground
Offer a kind word or strike up a conversation at playgroup
Send a message to someone you’ve been thinking of
Say, “Hey, I’ve felt like that too” when someone shares something hard
We often believe we’re the only ones struggling—but we’re not. And sometimes, a quiet moment of kindness becomes a lifeline for both of you.
You don’t have to do this alone
Choosing to become a parent doesn’t mean you’re expected to carry everything on your own. Everyone needs help sometimes. Seeking support is not a sign of weakness—it’s an act of care.
You're not alone in this. Your village is out there. Sometimes it begins with just one small step.
Below are some trusted services you can reach out to if you need support—whether it’s for mental health, parenting, breastfeeding, or crisis help:
Helpful Resources
Lifeline – 13 11 14 (24/7 crisis support)
PANDA (Perinatal Anxiety & Depression Australia) – 1300 726 306 (Mon–Fri, 9am–7:30pm AEST)
National Breastfeeding Helpline – 1800 686 268 (24/7 support)
Pregnancy, Birth & Baby – 1800 882 436 (7am–midnight AEST, 7 days)
Playgroup Australia – 1800 171 882 (Mon–Fri, 9am–3pm)
SANE Australia – 1800 187 263 (Mon–Fri, 9am–5pm mental health support)
1800 RESPECT – 1800 737 732 (24/7 family violence and sexual assault support)
Suicide Call Back Service – 1300 659 467 (24/7)
Mental Health Emergency Response Line (WA) – 1300 555 788 (Perth) or 1800 676 822 (Peel)
Centre of Perinatal Excellence (COPE) Directory - www.directory.cope.org.au
